To be or not to be..

To be or not to be, that is the question.

Sorry Hamlet but I hardly consider this a question…

Decisions are not my strong suite believe it or not, but I’m learning to always BE. Be in control of my decisions, Be my best and Be really fucking happy.

I struggle with it and I believe plenty other people do as well. Making choices, BIG calls, not about what to have for dinner, if you should hit snooze again or get up, or what shoes you should wear today (although I always make my nike’s work..), I’m talking about decisions that will change you life on a large scale. School, Career’s  Lifestyle Changes, Moving, Large purchases, falling in love, things that you know will effect everything including the people around you… REAL FUCKING DECISIONS.

Weighing pro’s and con’s, giving in or letting go it’s all apart of the process the decision making blueprint embedded in us from birth – we are taught to hold onto things. anything we can get our hands onto, grasp it as if we will cease to exist if we let it go. Because letting go is giving up, quitting, and we all know that a cowardly thing to do. I’m learning as I grow older that we have to change our way of thinking. Maybe our parents, guardians or whomever, don’t actually know whats best for us. We need to be able to think for ourselves and learn to make proper decisions for ourselves because we are the only ones living our lives. Sometimes you need to let go and sometimes you need to hold on and run with it. Most importantly you need to make whatever decision you have to for YOURSELF. If a situation is weighing you down, change it. Stop worrying about other people and they’re petty expectations, learn to say no without feeling guilty. This is your life and if people can’t respect the decisions you make, well than that’s their problem not yours. Their loss.

The hardest part of it all isn’t the decision itself. It’s not what school or what program or what house or what car, that’s not the hard part because your heart and your gut already know what you want and what makes you happy. The hardest part is deciding that other peoples opinions on YOUR decision doesn’t matter. You need to draw that fucking line and do whats best for you. This is the only you you will ever have and you better make it a  damn happy one.

fight for yourself, you deserve that much.

thatgymgirl.